Yesterday, the word “schmuck” erupted from my pen.
For those of you out there who speak fluent Yiddish … yeah, I knew it was dangerous. Technically, “schmuck” is a Yiddish word for a particular part of the male anatomy … though that translation probably has fallen into the realm of the archaic.
For good or ill, “schmuck” has osmosified into the common and polite vernacular of American speakers of English. It’s fairly commonly rendered as a synonym for “fool” or “chump.”
One source offered up “boob” as an alternative. Yeah, that’s helpful.
Back in the 1960s, Lenny Bruce got arrested for saying “schmuck” onstage. A few years later, I watched a small-town city councilman ream out a colleague for calling him a schmuck, feigning great offense at the literal translation.
Even though the word has migrated into the “relatively benign” column over the last 30 years, it’s still a potential land mine for writers.
Yet, trekking among the Claymores is sometimes worth the risk. After all, juggling lessons for “a marginally coordinated fool” fails to impart the same savoir-faire. An ill-coordinated patsy, similarly, lacks the appropriate punch and panache – along with victim, can-carrier, trusting soul and “jestee.”
You can’t just blindly trust a thesaurus for consistently effective word choices. Consider the implications of other thesaurhetorical alternatives, like whipping boy, schlemiel, simpleton, retard, sucker and the aforementioned “boob.”
And I’d be willing to bet, in a politically correct world, an organizations like PETA or the SPCA might find offense in synonymatically speaking derisively of pigeons, turkeys, sitting ducks, goats, lambs to the slaughter, scapegoats, birdbrains, gulls, asses, dumb asses or jackasses.
Bottom line, suck it up and call a schmuck a schmuck.
Truth be known, the brain of the Writer must compile its own internal thesaurus as the years pass by. Read. Talk to people – and not just those who look or think or talk like you. Read some more. Write. Thumb through a thesaurus to experiment with choices … but, in the end, rely on your internal compass to guide you through the minefield.
If you’re going to get reamed out for your choice of words, do the research, and think it through. Get reamed for a choice made consciously – for the effect intended – and not for some careless misuse of a word you failed to understand.
Next: Word Choice (Part 2) … Puck, truck & suck
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