Verbing

Ever notice that it seems to be getting harder and harder to tell the difference between nouns and verbs these days?  Let me shed some light on this timely topic with a few seemingly topical observations ....

The English language, I’m happy to announce, has now become so flexible that we can email an email.

I think I’ll text you about that one after I google up some thoughts.

Do we use funds to fund that project, or can I just forward the money?  Because, surely, that will adversely impact progress.  Am I making progress here, with this progression of progressively complex examples?  Exemplary, my dear Watson!

I suspect I never fathered a child because my parenting skills were suspect.  But, creativity is the father of intention.

We should really talk about this: Let’s do lunch.  We’ll need a liaison to facilitate that, though; who can we talk into liaising for us?  Maybe we should just get lazy and laze around the house while we dine.

I’ll have to access my schedule to make sure I’m free ... but I can probably free up some time in any case.  I’ll contact you when I know.  I hope our schedules don’t conflict, ‘cause I detest conflict ... most of the time, anyway – I’ve always been a little conflicted about that.

I think I need an organizer to write this all down so I have access to it later ... but I’m not organized enough to locate a retail organization who sells them, so I’m not sure I’m sold on that idea.

(If I stop off at church for a little keyboard practice, will I then be organ-izing?  Or at the pastor’s lectern for a lecture ... will I be sternly lectured if I take the lectern to the rear of the church?  Or should I just collect the collection plates?  Let’s get together and make a decision ... collectively.)

I’ve got a couple ideas about growing your business that might grow on you ... grow, grow grow your boat, gently down the stream (talk about stream of consciousness!), merrily, verily, scarily, warily; strife is jest a scream.

In general – generally, that is – I could be serious when I contend that the flexibility to flip-flop among verbs, adjectives, gerunds, nouns and adverbs is one of the things that makes writing fun in English.  Thing is, though, I’m really just funning you.

Seriously.  Are we agreed?  Because you have the right to object, am I right?  If so, what is the object of your objection?  Affection?  Rejection?

Can you prescribe a prescription to solute a solution for all these convoluted convolutions?  Perhaps we need to engage an advocate to advocate our diverse points of view about this pending engagement.  Lawyer up, as it were.

Or, we could just man up and decide on our own (our owns?) to salute these various salutations with salutatory indifference.  Do you object to my objections?  That was the object in the first place – to place the onus on you.

One time.

For we are one.

But I don’t want to single you out.  Not one single time.

Ain’t the English language great?  Or does it just grate on your ear?  Gratefully, I’m done; I’ve done it.  Put a fork in me – I’m done abusing y'all with all this verbal abuse.

Next: Disambiguation

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